Dearest Ashley,
Thanks to you again, I fell in love with Aang, the Avatar. I must say this is the best cartoon series in the whole universe. We shared the exciting journey with Aang to master the four elements. Beisdes the awesome earth, water, air and fire bending, we learned about friendship vs. betrayal, honour vs. shame, love vs. hatred, peace vs. war, sacrifice vs. selfishness and the list goes on. The most memorable part for Mum was when Uncle Iroh asked Zuko,
"Who are you? What do you really want?"
That set Zuko thinking.
Previously, he gunned Avatar down for years just to please his Father, as he knew the only way for his Father to love and accept him was to capture Avatar. After going through many life turning moments like the one he was saved by Avatar in the snow, he realised that his Father was an evil leader who wanted to conquer the world and ruled all nations by fear. He stood up against his Father and left to join Avatar. I applaud him for having the courage to being true to himself.
On a lighter note, I also admired Avatar for being true to himself when he confessed his love for Karata and kissed her before the invasion. Remember the invisible red string in Ocean's song this morning? It goes like this,
"No matter where we are, we're tied and connected by this red string. It will bring us to our garden of love."
Mummy sees alot of similarities between you and Aang. Like Aang, your heart is filled with love; love for your family, friends and pets. Your cartwheel and wushu moves are as great as Aang. You're my Avatar, so kind and courageous, so funny and happy.
I can't wait to watch the Avatar 3D movie with you, Abby and Daddy next week!
Here's the second dose of words of wisdom for today:
"Do good and leave behind a virtue that the storm of time can never destroy." ~ Robin Sharma, author of No. 1 International Bestseller
Yours,
Mummy from the Love Nation
Friday, July 30, 2010
Who turned on the school canteen light this morning?
Dearest Ashley,
Thanks to you, I had the honour to turn on the lights in your school canteen this morning. Mummy had never been the first to reach school like you. When we sat in the canteen eating donuts, Mummy asked you why you want to reach school as early as 6:10am and your reply jerked me a little. You shared with me that you like to come to school early so that you can sleep in the hall and wait for your friends. You like your friends to praise you for being the 1st to arrive in school!
Now I know why you cried when you woke up at 6:30pm on Wed morning. You don't want to be the last to reach school. Sometimes, Mummy was taken aback by what you said, especially on that eventful Wed morning.
Ashley: I hate Aunty. She woke me up late.
Mum: Ashley, don't blame Aunty.
Ashley: No, teachers will blame me for being late for school.
Mum: Don't be afraid, you won't be late.
Ashley: I'm not afraid of teachers' scolding, I'm not afraid of teachers.
Mum: Then why are you so worried?
Ashley: I just want to reach school early. I don't want to be late.
Based on my observations, I realised you are unlike the regular kids who are afraid of teachers. I don't mean you need to fear teachers but you must respect them. They are like your parents in school. They have good intention for you and care for you though sometimes their words and actions may not please you.
Mummy is happy that you want to be early for school but if you woke up too early, your "battery" will run flat very soon. Being punctual is a good habit but being early to receive praises from your friends may not sound like a good habit. We long for praises, even adults. However, if we intentionally do things to chase praises, we may not be doing the right thing. In the same light, do we chase after money to make us successful and happy or do we do the right and happy things so that success chase after us? What are the priorities in your life? Are you practising your priorities everyday? How do you feel when you practised your priorities?
Thought you will like today's Words of Wisdom:
"When we learn to say a deep, passionate yes to the things that really matter, then peace begins to settle onto our lives like golden sunlight sifting to a forest floor." ~ Thomas Kinkaide, artist
Lots of hugs and love,
Mummy's first priority is You & Abby
Thanks to you, I had the honour to turn on the lights in your school canteen this morning. Mummy had never been the first to reach school like you. When we sat in the canteen eating donuts, Mummy asked you why you want to reach school as early as 6:10am and your reply jerked me a little. You shared with me that you like to come to school early so that you can sleep in the hall and wait for your friends. You like your friends to praise you for being the 1st to arrive in school!
Now I know why you cried when you woke up at 6:30pm on Wed morning. You don't want to be the last to reach school. Sometimes, Mummy was taken aback by what you said, especially on that eventful Wed morning.
Ashley: I hate Aunty. She woke me up late.
Mum: Ashley, don't blame Aunty.
Ashley: No, teachers will blame me for being late for school.
Mum: Don't be afraid, you won't be late.
Ashley: I'm not afraid of teachers' scolding, I'm not afraid of teachers.
Mum: Then why are you so worried?
Ashley: I just want to reach school early. I don't want to be late.
Based on my observations, I realised you are unlike the regular kids who are afraid of teachers. I don't mean you need to fear teachers but you must respect them. They are like your parents in school. They have good intention for you and care for you though sometimes their words and actions may not please you.
Mummy is happy that you want to be early for school but if you woke up too early, your "battery" will run flat very soon. Being punctual is a good habit but being early to receive praises from your friends may not sound like a good habit. We long for praises, even adults. However, if we intentionally do things to chase praises, we may not be doing the right thing. In the same light, do we chase after money to make us successful and happy or do we do the right and happy things so that success chase after us? What are the priorities in your life? Are you practising your priorities everyday? How do you feel when you practised your priorities?
Thought you will like today's Words of Wisdom:
"When we learn to say a deep, passionate yes to the things that really matter, then peace begins to settle onto our lives like golden sunlight sifting to a forest floor." ~ Thomas Kinkaide, artist
Lots of hugs and love,
Mummy's first priority is You & Abby
Thursday, July 29, 2010
Focus on Gratitude
Dearest Ashley,
Do you agree we have a good meeting with your teacher? Your teacher explained to us why she withdrew your PE lesson and she also made the following comments:
1. You behaved well today. Why your behaviour was different from yesterday when you were playing with your wushu red belt?
2. You could answer all the Qs in class but your written work does not tally with your verbal ability. Why? Your carelessness resulted in many unnecessary corrections.
3. You have the intelligence, don't waste it.
4. Be more attentive in class and more careful in your work, you can do very well.
5. Teacher sincerely cares for you.
You're indeed a very lucky boy to be surrounded by teachers who geninuely care for you. Good advice comes in two forms: nice encouraging words and not so nice advising words.
Good things always come in a pair. We met another wonderful teacher on the same day. Though she taught you 1.5 years ago, she could still remember you as the bubbly "Best Actor" who livened up the class. You enjoyed her lessons until she became stricter with you on your behaviour and writing. You refused to listen to her and dropped out of her class. Yesterday, while you were reciting the passage on stage, she commented to Mummy that how much you have matured and grown. Mum proudly agreed with her.
Since you're maturing into a young adult, Mummy loves to share with you the Words of Wisdom for today:
"If the only prayer you said in your whole life was "Thank you," that would suffice." ~ Meister Eckhart, thirteenth-century German theologian
Yours,
Mummy who constantly carries a grateful heart
Do you agree we have a good meeting with your teacher? Your teacher explained to us why she withdrew your PE lesson and she also made the following comments:
1. You behaved well today. Why your behaviour was different from yesterday when you were playing with your wushu red belt?
2. You could answer all the Qs in class but your written work does not tally with your verbal ability. Why? Your carelessness resulted in many unnecessary corrections.
3. You have the intelligence, don't waste it.
4. Be more attentive in class and more careful in your work, you can do very well.
5. Teacher sincerely cares for you.
You're indeed a very lucky boy to be surrounded by teachers who geninuely care for you. Good advice comes in two forms: nice encouraging words and not so nice advising words.
Good things always come in a pair. We met another wonderful teacher on the same day. Though she taught you 1.5 years ago, she could still remember you as the bubbly "Best Actor" who livened up the class. You enjoyed her lessons until she became stricter with you on your behaviour and writing. You refused to listen to her and dropped out of her class. Yesterday, while you were reciting the passage on stage, she commented to Mummy that how much you have matured and grown. Mum proudly agreed with her.
Since you're maturing into a young adult, Mummy loves to share with you the Words of Wisdom for today:
"If the only prayer you said in your whole life was "Thank you," that would suffice." ~ Meister Eckhart, thirteenth-century German theologian
Yours,
Mummy who constantly carries a grateful heart
Tuesday, July 27, 2010
Abby and her calculator
Dearest Abby,
Two nights ago, you surprised Mummy with your calculator. While Mummy was massaging Ashley Koko, you were playing with your calculator by yourself for almost 15 mins. When it was your turn to be massaged, you took a pencil and paper to my bedroom. While I was massaging you, you were busy scribbling and punching your calculator away. After your massage, I was very surprsied to see what you have written:
Front page:
45 + 20 = 65
69 + 15 = 84
120 + 10 = 130
Back page:
60- 15 = 45
58 - 12 = 46
100 - 20 = 80
You asked me to write on each side of the paper, "I learn addition from calculator" & "I learn minus from calculator". You want to show Teacher Esther this precious piece of work you have done. Wow, Mummy is impressed by you!
Yesterday, I can see you beaming with joy as you showed your teacher what you learned from the calculator. You even recited your poems for your friends and teachers. Well Done!
Mummy bought you a red and yellow Cash Register as I know you will enjoy the new toy and continue with your learning from the Cash Register calculator!
Yours,
Mummy who loves playing calculator with Abby
Two nights ago, you surprised Mummy with your calculator. While Mummy was massaging Ashley Koko, you were playing with your calculator by yourself for almost 15 mins. When it was your turn to be massaged, you took a pencil and paper to my bedroom. While I was massaging you, you were busy scribbling and punching your calculator away. After your massage, I was very surprsied to see what you have written:
Front page:
45 + 20 = 65
69 + 15 = 84
120 + 10 = 130
Back page:
60- 15 = 45
58 - 12 = 46
100 - 20 = 80
You asked me to write on each side of the paper, "I learn addition from calculator" & "I learn minus from calculator". You want to show Teacher Esther this precious piece of work you have done. Wow, Mummy is impressed by you!
Yesterday, I can see you beaming with joy as you showed your teacher what you learned from the calculator. You even recited your poems for your friends and teachers. Well Done!
Mummy bought you a red and yellow Cash Register as I know you will enjoy the new toy and continue with your learning from the Cash Register calculator!
Yours,
Mummy who loves playing calculator with Abby
Mummy's 60 school teachers in my 16 years of education
Dearest Ashley,
Nowadays you are my faithful alarm clock. This morning, you woke me up at 6am and we left for school at 6:10am. I'm getting to enjoy my one and only cheerful alarm clock on weekdays!
Thanks for sharing with me your challenges in school in the car. I know it must be tough for you to get scolded by teacher for lending a ruler to your classmate, scolded for walking over to your classmates to borrow stationary, scolded for not paying attention and rocking your chair, and withdrew from PE lesson for talking in class.
Mummy is glad that we agreed on the action plan to address these issues:
1. You will keep a good posture and try not to rock your chair
2. You will buy the stationary from your bookshop
3. You will try not to talk to your friend when the teacher is talking
4. You will pay more attention in class
5. Mummy will meet your teacher today to have a chat with her
Last night, you were so emotional and disturbed by the scolding incidents that your tears streamed down your cheek. That was when Dad, Mum and Ah Mah tried to console you and shared with you our fair share of teachers encounterments. It was so commom during our time that Mum, Dad and your uncles got caning and scolding from teachers. Ah Mah brought up several good points:
1. Your teachers cared for you, that's why they bother to correct your behaviour.
2. You cannot choose your teachers. As much as you love humourous teachers, every teacher is different. Likewise, every Mummy, every child is different. This is part of education. It is good for you to be exposed to different teachers at a young age as this depicts working world when you grow up. Your colleagues and bosses are very different from you. How do you make sure you work well with them to get the job done?
Mummy has about 60 teachers in my 16 years of education. I can't remember all of them. I could only remember 8 teachers:
Nowadays you are my faithful alarm clock. This morning, you woke me up at 6am and we left for school at 6:10am. I'm getting to enjoy my one and only cheerful alarm clock on weekdays!
Thanks for sharing with me your challenges in school in the car. I know it must be tough for you to get scolded by teacher for lending a ruler to your classmate, scolded for walking over to your classmates to borrow stationary, scolded for not paying attention and rocking your chair, and withdrew from PE lesson for talking in class.
Mummy is glad that we agreed on the action plan to address these issues:
1. You will keep a good posture and try not to rock your chair
2. You will buy the stationary from your bookshop
3. You will try not to talk to your friend when the teacher is talking
4. You will pay more attention in class
5. Mummy will meet your teacher today to have a chat with her
Last night, you were so emotional and disturbed by the scolding incidents that your tears streamed down your cheek. That was when Dad, Mum and Ah Mah tried to console you and shared with you our fair share of teachers encounterments. It was so commom during our time that Mum, Dad and your uncles got caning and scolding from teachers. Ah Mah brought up several good points:
1. Your teachers cared for you, that's why they bother to correct your behaviour.
2. You cannot choose your teachers. As much as you love humourous teachers, every teacher is different. Likewise, every Mummy, every child is different. This is part of education. It is good for you to be exposed to different teachers at a young age as this depicts working world when you grow up. Your colleagues and bosses are very different from you. How do you make sure you work well with them to get the job done?
Mummy has about 60 teachers in my 16 years of education. I can't remember all of them. I could only remember 8 teachers:
- Primary school - my kind and gentle P6 English teacher who read out my compo and my strict P5 Science teacher who told us the importance of writing our names neatly
- Secondary school - my strict but kind Sec 1 Chinese teacher who named me the Class Treasurer and my humourous Sec 4 Chinese teacher who told me the funniest story of how the early bird catches its worm and how the early worm is caught by the bird
- JC - my eccentric Chemistry teacher and my Charming Physics teacher
- NTU - our Final year project lecturer who coached Mum & Dad and our Medical Eqm lecturer who teased Mum & Dad (in a nice way) in a lecture
Interestingly, my memories of teachers are mostly happy. Of course, there are unhappy memories too. However, we choose what memories we want to keep. Mummy always look for the lesson and the gift in every situation and every person.
I'll like to share the words of Wisdom for today:
"The best years of your life are the ones in which you decide your problems are your own. You do not blame them on your mother, the ecology, or the president. You realise that you control your own destiny." ~ Dr. Albert Ellis, Psyschologist
Yours,
Mummy who appreciates all the teachers who have taught me, even those who scolded and canned me
Monday, July 26, 2010
Making big splashes on rainy days
Dearest Ashley,
Thanks to you, we left for school at 6:15am and the 10 mins journey was smooth and easy. Compared to the 1-hour heavy jam we had the other day, we got to enjoy the rain this morning. Coincidentially, the moment we got into the car, we heard Ocean singing, "Let it rain, let it rain, though we are totally drenched, I can still see the sunshine in your eyes. Let us smile and hold each other's hands even tighter." Isn't it beautiful?
We were discussing about how road conditions represent life. Compared to people who were still sleeping, early birds were the minority. It is hard to wake up early especially on a rainy day. By the same token, it is hard to practise hardwork and discipline. Just like the road we travelled on today, we only spotted a few cars.
What a fantastic way to start our day! We were singing with Ocean and enjoying the big splashes while driving in the heavy rain. Conversely, we were panicking and sweating when we were caught in the jam to school when we woke up late and you only reached school at 8am! Without a doubt, you agreed with Mummy that we want to choose a smoother and happier life journey make up of hardwork and discipline. Mummy is proud of you as you made this important commitment to practise hardwork and discipline for a bright future.
I know you like rainy days as much as sunny days. You enjoy the big splashes and strong wind on rainy days. For the drivers, rainy days mean blurry vision and extra-cautious driving. We were also chatting about how rainy days represent the setbacks in life and if we were splashed on right at our face, we should stay calm as anxiety will cause more danger. On the other hand, we can enjoy making big splashes while driving through puddles. We just have to make sure we don't splash on others. Hahaha...
Just to share with you the Words of Wisdom for today:
"We are disturbed not by what happens to us, but by our thoughts about what happens."
~ Epictetus, Greek Philosopher
Yours,
Mummy who loves to sing and dance in the rain
Thanks to you, we left for school at 6:15am and the 10 mins journey was smooth and easy. Compared to the 1-hour heavy jam we had the other day, we got to enjoy the rain this morning. Coincidentially, the moment we got into the car, we heard Ocean singing, "Let it rain, let it rain, though we are totally drenched, I can still see the sunshine in your eyes. Let us smile and hold each other's hands even tighter." Isn't it beautiful?
We were discussing about how road conditions represent life. Compared to people who were still sleeping, early birds were the minority. It is hard to wake up early especially on a rainy day. By the same token, it is hard to practise hardwork and discipline. Just like the road we travelled on today, we only spotted a few cars.
What a fantastic way to start our day! We were singing with Ocean and enjoying the big splashes while driving in the heavy rain. Conversely, we were panicking and sweating when we were caught in the jam to school when we woke up late and you only reached school at 8am! Without a doubt, you agreed with Mummy that we want to choose a smoother and happier life journey make up of hardwork and discipline. Mummy is proud of you as you made this important commitment to practise hardwork and discipline for a bright future.
I know you like rainy days as much as sunny days. You enjoy the big splashes and strong wind on rainy days. For the drivers, rainy days mean blurry vision and extra-cautious driving. We were also chatting about how rainy days represent the setbacks in life and if we were splashed on right at our face, we should stay calm as anxiety will cause more danger. On the other hand, we can enjoy making big splashes while driving through puddles. We just have to make sure we don't splash on others. Hahaha...
Just to share with you the Words of Wisdom for today:
"We are disturbed not by what happens to us, but by our thoughts about what happens."
~ Epictetus, Greek Philosopher
Yours,
Mummy who loves to sing and dance in the rain
Sunday, July 25, 2010
My Little Princess who grows up in the Fantasy Forest
Dearest Abby,
We started playing Fantasy Forest board game with Ashley Kor Kor early this year. You just wanted to be in Koko's team and watched us play. Soon, you wanted to play by yourself. Each time we were ahead of you, you started to cry. You wanted the Heroes so badly so that you could beat us. We tried to pacify you but to no avail. So we had to re-start the game and when you won, you were laughing so loudly.
Over time, you got better at the game. You know the names of all the Heroes and Monsters. You know the shortcuts with each card. You know how to strategize. But, this time, you tried to choose all the Heroes and powerful cards so that you could reach the castle faster. Mummy tried to explain to you that we played fairly and the dealer would deal out the cards to all the players. You started to throw tantrums again. Your love-hate relationship with Fantasy Forest grew and you were so obessed with the Forest that you wanted us to play with you almost every night.
Yesterday morning, you wanted Mummy to play Fantasy Forest the moment you opened your eyes. I was proud to say my little Princess has grown into a brave Princess who learns how to take defeats graciously and win fairly. Way to go, Girl!!!!!!!!!
Yours,
Your Partner in Fantasy Forest
We started playing Fantasy Forest board game with Ashley Kor Kor early this year. You just wanted to be in Koko's team and watched us play. Soon, you wanted to play by yourself. Each time we were ahead of you, you started to cry. You wanted the Heroes so badly so that you could beat us. We tried to pacify you but to no avail. So we had to re-start the game and when you won, you were laughing so loudly.
Over time, you got better at the game. You know the names of all the Heroes and Monsters. You know the shortcuts with each card. You know how to strategize. But, this time, you tried to choose all the Heroes and powerful cards so that you could reach the castle faster. Mummy tried to explain to you that we played fairly and the dealer would deal out the cards to all the players. You started to throw tantrums again. Your love-hate relationship with Fantasy Forest grew and you were so obessed with the Forest that you wanted us to play with you almost every night.
Yesterday morning, you wanted Mummy to play Fantasy Forest the moment you opened your eyes. I was proud to say my little Princess has grown into a brave Princess who learns how to take defeats graciously and win fairly. Way to go, Girl!!!!!!!!!
Yours,
Your Partner in Fantasy Forest
My Little Poet
Dearest Abby,
Do you know Mummy was pleasantly surprised when you recited the poem Dear World to me? So full of emotions and so crystal clear. Mummy is so happy that you enjoy the book Dear World by Takayo Noda. We have a fun time reciting the poems, laughing at the silly words and drawing the flying car and the tall fat snowman with a long funny carrot nose. Thanks to you, Mummy gets to enjoy these lovely poems as an adult.
Mummy will always remember the very first poem you shared with me:
Flowers smell so sweetie sweet,
Hello Birdies Tweetie Tweet,
Berries are my favourite things,
Birds and Flowers,
it must be Spring
Mummy likes to share the beautiful poems you created yesterday with all my friends:
Z:
Zippi Zebra Z Z Z
Zippi Zebra goes to Zoo
Zippi Zebra goes to school
Zippi Zebra Zoom around
Y:
Yoghurt man says Y Y Y
I love Yoghurt
The sun is Yellow
The yak starts Yawning
X:
MaX and MaXi X X X
MaX and MaXi found a friend
Pixie Pixie is their friend
W:
Willie Worm W W W
Likes to wriggle in the soil
Teacher Esther dug it up
Put it in the flower pot
V:
Vicky Violet V V V
Vicky Violet takes the soil
throws it to the wriggly worm
U:
Unicorn says U U U
Princess Judy sits on it
Ugly giant scares the Princess
Princess July tickles the giant
T:
Teppy Tigger T T T
Teggy Tigger needs a Towel
Shower in a small bath Tub
S:
Sammy Snake S S S
Shower with his eagle friend
blowing bubbles in the bathroom
then they Slip and fall
R:
Robbi Rabbit R R R
Runs around the garden
Chases away the Rain
Climbs above the Rainbow
to get some golden coins
to be continued....
Mummy is very proud of you, my Little Poet who writes so well.
Your Greatest Fan,
Mummy
Do you know Mummy was pleasantly surprised when you recited the poem Dear World to me? So full of emotions and so crystal clear. Mummy is so happy that you enjoy the book Dear World by Takayo Noda. We have a fun time reciting the poems, laughing at the silly words and drawing the flying car and the tall fat snowman with a long funny carrot nose. Thanks to you, Mummy gets to enjoy these lovely poems as an adult.
Mummy will always remember the very first poem you shared with me:
Flowers smell so sweetie sweet,
Hello Birdies Tweetie Tweet,
Berries are my favourite things,
Birds and Flowers,
it must be Spring
Mummy likes to share the beautiful poems you created yesterday with all my friends:
Z:
Zippi Zebra Z Z Z
Zippi Zebra goes to Zoo
Zippi Zebra goes to school
Zippi Zebra Zoom around
Y:
Yoghurt man says Y Y Y
I love Yoghurt
The sun is Yellow
The yak starts Yawning
X:
MaX and MaXi X X X
MaX and MaXi found a friend
Pixie Pixie is their friend
W:
Willie Worm W W W
Likes to wriggle in the soil
Teacher Esther dug it up
Put it in the flower pot
V:
Vicky Violet V V V
Vicky Violet takes the soil
throws it to the wriggly worm
U:
Unicorn says U U U
Princess Judy sits on it
Ugly giant scares the Princess
Princess July tickles the giant
T:
Teppy Tigger T T T
Teggy Tigger needs a Towel
Shower in a small bath Tub
S:
Sammy Snake S S S
Shower with his eagle friend
blowing bubbles in the bathroom
then they Slip and fall
R:
Robbi Rabbit R R R
Runs around the garden
Chases away the Rain
Climbs above the Rainbow
to get some golden coins
to be continued....
Mummy is very proud of you, my Little Poet who writes so well.
Your Greatest Fan,
Mummy
Wednesday, July 21, 2010
Lovable Despicable Me
Dearest Ashley,
We had a great time watching the movie Despicable Me with Titus. Through the 3 girls, Gru transformed himself from a baddie who steals people's happiness to a loving father who sacrifices the moon for his 3 girls. Remember how he rushed back from outerspace to catch their ballet recital? Remember his childhood memory of how his "nah" Mum discouraged him? Due to this lack of recognition when he was a kid, he vowed to be the Greatest Villian to steal the Greatest thing on earth when he grew up. He became one but still he did not get the happiness and recognition from his mother. However, when towards the end, he was watching the 3 girls' ballet recital with his Mum, she said to him, "I'm very proud of you, son". You could see the sparkle in Gru's eyes. He finally earned the recognition from his mother. To me, that moment was very touching. To you, the part Gru stole the Eiffel Tower was most hilarious.
Besides the movie, I also got to know your best friend, Titus, better. I must say I'm very impressed by him. In the car, he shared with us the incident he almost broke one of the 10 Commandments; At the counter, I wanted to buy him the large popcorn but he told me he wanted the small one as he cannot finish; I got him orange juice but he only asked me for water; he shared good stuff like the new Avatar book series and even brought us to the book shop to buy it; he asked you not to read in the car, etc. He is a Godly, honest and happy boy. Mother is very happy that you are each other's best friend. Last night on our way home, you told me you wanted to be a Christian just like Titus. I can see the positive influence Titus has on you. Enjoy your friendship and fun growing up with Titus.
Yours,
Mummy
We had a great time watching the movie Despicable Me with Titus. Through the 3 girls, Gru transformed himself from a baddie who steals people's happiness to a loving father who sacrifices the moon for his 3 girls. Remember how he rushed back from outerspace to catch their ballet recital? Remember his childhood memory of how his "nah" Mum discouraged him? Due to this lack of recognition when he was a kid, he vowed to be the Greatest Villian to steal the Greatest thing on earth when he grew up. He became one but still he did not get the happiness and recognition from his mother. However, when towards the end, he was watching the 3 girls' ballet recital with his Mum, she said to him, "I'm very proud of you, son". You could see the sparkle in Gru's eyes. He finally earned the recognition from his mother. To me, that moment was very touching. To you, the part Gru stole the Eiffel Tower was most hilarious.
Besides the movie, I also got to know your best friend, Titus, better. I must say I'm very impressed by him. In the car, he shared with us the incident he almost broke one of the 10 Commandments; At the counter, I wanted to buy him the large popcorn but he told me he wanted the small one as he cannot finish; I got him orange juice but he only asked me for water; he shared good stuff like the new Avatar book series and even brought us to the book shop to buy it; he asked you not to read in the car, etc. He is a Godly, honest and happy boy. Mother is very happy that you are each other's best friend. Last night on our way home, you told me you wanted to be a Christian just like Titus. I can see the positive influence Titus has on you. Enjoy your friendship and fun growing up with Titus.
Yours,
Mummy
Mummy is proud of your ABC in school
Dearest Ashley,
It pains me when I see you cough so much and so hard. This morning I tried to encourage you to go to school but you said I don't care about you. I care for you with all my heart. Mummy does not want you to skip school. Though the dcotor gave you MC, he also mentioned that if you're ok this morning, you can go school as you have no fever. Seeing you coughing non-stop, I decided to let you rest at home today.
Last Friday, you shared with me that you were the only one in class who volunteered to accompany your calssmate to the sick bed as none of them want to miss the English teacher's lesson. I know how much you enjoy his lesson as he always tells jokes in class. When you told me you volunteered yourself because you feel that accompanying him to wait for his Mummy was more important than one English lesson, I complimented you for caring for your classmate. Though you mentioned your teacher said you're doing ok in English, you know you have to place top priority in your study. I know I can trust you to catch up that one lesson from your classmate.
Yesterday morning, you shared with me you have done your ABC in school:
A - Attentiveness
B - Best Behaviour
C- Courteous
You put in alot more effort in A though some lessons are boring. Mummy is very proud of you for your effort to be more attentive in class. Well done.
Remembered what the ACSI Sec 3 Ruby player said to you when he and his family visited us during CNY? He was from your Primary school and he was an average student till Primary 5 when he decided to study hard for his future. He shone in PSLE and he enjoyed his school life even more now as he got to stay in school hostel, interacting with school mates from different countries in sports, projects and learning. His secret in Primary school?
1. Pay attention in class
2. Study for 2 hours everyday
3. Study the subject in advance so that he could ask teacher Qs on topics he wanted to know more
4. Play sports and less computer games
I'm very proud to have a son like you, talented, caring and creative. I know you want to enjoy and succeed in your Primary school just like the ACSI Ruby boy, JC2 boy and Kieran. You will become like them as they have shared with you their success tips. It is time to listen to good advice and take action. Remember E+R = O? I can guarantee you the positive Outcome when you continue to choose positive Reaction/action. Cheers!
Lots of hugs and kisses,
Mummy
It pains me when I see you cough so much and so hard. This morning I tried to encourage you to go to school but you said I don't care about you. I care for you with all my heart. Mummy does not want you to skip school. Though the dcotor gave you MC, he also mentioned that if you're ok this morning, you can go school as you have no fever. Seeing you coughing non-stop, I decided to let you rest at home today.
Last Friday, you shared with me that you were the only one in class who volunteered to accompany your calssmate to the sick bed as none of them want to miss the English teacher's lesson. I know how much you enjoy his lesson as he always tells jokes in class. When you told me you volunteered yourself because you feel that accompanying him to wait for his Mummy was more important than one English lesson, I complimented you for caring for your classmate. Though you mentioned your teacher said you're doing ok in English, you know you have to place top priority in your study. I know I can trust you to catch up that one lesson from your classmate.
Yesterday morning, you shared with me you have done your ABC in school:
A - Attentiveness
B - Best Behaviour
C- Courteous
You put in alot more effort in A though some lessons are boring. Mummy is very proud of you for your effort to be more attentive in class. Well done.
Remembered what the ACSI Sec 3 Ruby player said to you when he and his family visited us during CNY? He was from your Primary school and he was an average student till Primary 5 when he decided to study hard for his future. He shone in PSLE and he enjoyed his school life even more now as he got to stay in school hostel, interacting with school mates from different countries in sports, projects and learning. His secret in Primary school?
1. Pay attention in class
2. Study for 2 hours everyday
3. Study the subject in advance so that he could ask teacher Qs on topics he wanted to know more
4. Play sports and less computer games
I'm very proud to have a son like you, talented, caring and creative. I know you want to enjoy and succeed in your Primary school just like the ACSI Ruby boy, JC2 boy and Kieran. You will become like them as they have shared with you their success tips. It is time to listen to good advice and take action. Remember E+R = O? I can guarantee you the positive Outcome when you continue to choose positive Reaction/action. Cheers!
Lots of hugs and kisses,
Mummy
Sunday, July 18, 2010
Hard love
Dear Friends,
I'm happy that we managed to keep Ashley from playing computer games the whole of last weekdays through our persistent effort. This morning, he woke up at 7:30am and started playing computer game. I got up immediately and said to him in a kind but firm tone that we should take a walk in our condo to open our eyes first as the glare from the computer will hurt his eyes. He graciously accepted my offer. As it was drizzling, he scootered while Abby cycled at our basement carpark for half an hour before we head home for breakfast. I kept my words and he started playing computer games for 30 minutes after his breakfast.
Abby likes to play in the car and sometimes refuses to buckle up. Today, I said to her in a kind but firm voice to buckle up but my words fell on deaf ears. I raised my voice a little and reminded her again. She started crying as she is very thin-skinned. I patiently explained to her why she must buckle up and hugged her. She stopped crying after 5 minutes and buckled up.
Many experienced parents and my Mum always reminded me to be firm with my kids so that they will not climb onto my head. I realised I was too soft and practised convenience parenting in the past. There are times when we let them have a choice but they must also learn that Mum and Dad's words are final.
Regards,
Loving Mum
I'm happy that we managed to keep Ashley from playing computer games the whole of last weekdays through our persistent effort. This morning, he woke up at 7:30am and started playing computer game. I got up immediately and said to him in a kind but firm tone that we should take a walk in our condo to open our eyes first as the glare from the computer will hurt his eyes. He graciously accepted my offer. As it was drizzling, he scootered while Abby cycled at our basement carpark for half an hour before we head home for breakfast. I kept my words and he started playing computer games for 30 minutes after his breakfast.
Abby likes to play in the car and sometimes refuses to buckle up. Today, I said to her in a kind but firm voice to buckle up but my words fell on deaf ears. I raised my voice a little and reminded her again. She started crying as she is very thin-skinned. I patiently explained to her why she must buckle up and hugged her. She stopped crying after 5 minutes and buckled up.
Many experienced parents and my Mum always reminded me to be firm with my kids so that they will not climb onto my head. I realised I was too soft and practised convenience parenting in the past. There are times when we let them have a choice but they must also learn that Mum and Dad's words are final.
Regards,
Loving Mum
E+R = O
Dearest Ashley,
Remember the two 18 year-old boys we met one after another? The first boy we met was a JC2 student at the Eye Centre and you saw how your Mum struck a conversation with him:
Mum: Hi, are you also wearing hard lens?
Boy1 : Yeah, my Mum also wears them.
Mum: How do you find JC life?
Boy1: Competitive. We have 100 overseas students out of 800 students. They are very hardworking and academically very strong.
Mum: How about the local students?
Boy1 : We have to focus on our strengths which they are weaker like presentation, debate and creative thinking.
Mum: What's your plan after your A Level?
Boy1: I plan to study Accountancy in NTU or SMU. My uncle is a very successful businessman and he encourages me to study Accountancy which is recession-proof and every country and industry require Accountants.
Mum: All the best to you.
Did you see how eloquent, confident and good-looking the boy was during our chat? He has decided what he wants in life and is working hard to reach his goal.
After we left the Eye Centre, we were approached by another 18 year-old boy who asked me for donation. Since you're munching away, you saw how Mum struck a conversation with him:
Boy2: We're representing a Charity Organisation to seek donation for the abused and needy children.
Mum: Ok. We'll make a donation. Are you a student? (We chatted while filling up the form).
Boy2 : I'm a Poly drop-out. I plan to enroll as a private student to continue my Poly study after my army.
Mum: All the best to you.
Did you notice he did not speak proper English and not very confident? He took a longer and more challenging path to complete his study compared to his peers who will complete their Poly before they enter army.
Maybe God arrange for you to meet the two boys one after another to help you fast forward your time to see your future in 9 years' time. Remember what your Dad taught you about begin with an end in mind? It may be a good idea to start thinking what kind of life you want at 18 years old and beyond.
Mummy knows you're still a kid but you know from your Adam Khoo camp that E+R =O. You may not be able to control the Events but you can control your Reactions which will affect the Outcome. Trainer Priscilla shared with Mummy that you fully understood this Principle and even acted two scenes, one with positive R which resulted in positive O and one with negative R & O. Mummy is proud of you as at a young age, you understand this important Principle. With everyday practice of generating positive reactions in challenging situations, you will achieve positive outcome, not once but many many times.
Hugs & Kisses,
Mummy
Remember the two 18 year-old boys we met one after another? The first boy we met was a JC2 student at the Eye Centre and you saw how your Mum struck a conversation with him:
Mum: Hi, are you also wearing hard lens?
Boy1 : Yeah, my Mum also wears them.
Mum: How do you find JC life?
Boy1: Competitive. We have 100 overseas students out of 800 students. They are very hardworking and academically very strong.
Mum: How about the local students?
Boy1 : We have to focus on our strengths which they are weaker like presentation, debate and creative thinking.
Mum: What's your plan after your A Level?
Boy1: I plan to study Accountancy in NTU or SMU. My uncle is a very successful businessman and he encourages me to study Accountancy which is recession-proof and every country and industry require Accountants.
Mum: All the best to you.
Did you see how eloquent, confident and good-looking the boy was during our chat? He has decided what he wants in life and is working hard to reach his goal.
After we left the Eye Centre, we were approached by another 18 year-old boy who asked me for donation. Since you're munching away, you saw how Mum struck a conversation with him:
Boy2: We're representing a Charity Organisation to seek donation for the abused and needy children.
Mum: Ok. We'll make a donation. Are you a student? (We chatted while filling up the form).
Boy2 : I'm a Poly drop-out. I plan to enroll as a private student to continue my Poly study after my army.
Mum: All the best to you.
Did you notice he did not speak proper English and not very confident? He took a longer and more challenging path to complete his study compared to his peers who will complete their Poly before they enter army.
Maybe God arrange for you to meet the two boys one after another to help you fast forward your time to see your future in 9 years' time. Remember what your Dad taught you about begin with an end in mind? It may be a good idea to start thinking what kind of life you want at 18 years old and beyond.
Mummy knows you're still a kid but you know from your Adam Khoo camp that E+R =O. You may not be able to control the Events but you can control your Reactions which will affect the Outcome. Trainer Priscilla shared with Mummy that you fully understood this Principle and even acted two scenes, one with positive R which resulted in positive O and one with negative R & O. Mummy is proud of you as at a young age, you understand this important Principle. With everyday practice of generating positive reactions in challenging situations, you will achieve positive outcome, not once but many many times.
Hugs & Kisses,
Mummy
Wednesday, July 14, 2010
Wise words from two Loving Fathers
Dear Friends,
I feel previleged to meet wonderful people in my profession whom I can learn from professionally and personally. Today, I met a new contact recommended by a dear friend. I was impressed by his professional track record and leadership style. However, it is his words he said to his children that made the deepest impression on me:
"I trust you completely. I support you unconditionally. Live by the Principles of honesty, hardwork and care for others".
He shared with me that though there are times he disapproved certain actions by his children, he tried to understand them as equals with patience. He shared an example that was close to my heart. Instead of stopping his children from spending time at the computer, he talked to them to understand what are they doing at the computer. Thereafter, he never checks on them at the computer. It is so important to walk the talk with our kids.
His elder son is very self-motivated and has decided to study Economics in the US or UK after he completed his 6 years education at Chinese High Integrated Program.
When I shared this wonderful story with my hubby how my contact interacted with his children, he agreed but added the most important thing is Ashley must be ready to learn. He must come to his own realisation the importance of study and we cannot push or try to accelerate this self-discovery process. We just have to continue to guide and support them unconditionally. We may plant 1000 seeds and only 1 seed may grow and we cannot dictate the timeline. A dose of wisdom from my hubby...
Best Regards,
Loving Mum
I feel previleged to meet wonderful people in my profession whom I can learn from professionally and personally. Today, I met a new contact recommended by a dear friend. I was impressed by his professional track record and leadership style. However, it is his words he said to his children that made the deepest impression on me:
"I trust you completely. I support you unconditionally. Live by the Principles of honesty, hardwork and care for others".
He shared with me that though there are times he disapproved certain actions by his children, he tried to understand them as equals with patience. He shared an example that was close to my heart. Instead of stopping his children from spending time at the computer, he talked to them to understand what are they doing at the computer. Thereafter, he never checks on them at the computer. It is so important to walk the talk with our kids.
His elder son is very self-motivated and has decided to study Economics in the US or UK after he completed his 6 years education at Chinese High Integrated Program.
When I shared this wonderful story with my hubby how my contact interacted with his children, he agreed but added the most important thing is Ashley must be ready to learn. He must come to his own realisation the importance of study and we cannot push or try to accelerate this self-discovery process. We just have to continue to guide and support them unconditionally. We may plant 1000 seeds and only 1 seed may grow and we cannot dictate the timeline. A dose of wisdom from my hubby...
Best Regards,
Loving Mum
Sounding like a broken record
Dear Friends,
I had an interesting conversation with Ashley on our way to school this morning...
Mum: Do you have PE today?
Ashley: Let me check. Oh, today has PE.
Mum: You're wearing school uniform. Are you allowed to take part in PE today?
Ashley: Nope, just sit one side and do nothing.
Mum: I thought you enjoyed PE?
Ashley: PE is boring now. Always do the boring stuff.
Mum: Which is more boring? Sit around or PE?
Ashley: So sickering, must remember so many things. I don't care!
Mum: What do you mean you don't care?
Ashley: It's hard to remember so many things about school!
Mum: How do you think Kieran can play the piano so beautifully without looking at the score?
Silent
Mum: How do you think Kieran got his grade 8 from grade 0 in 8 months at 18 years old?
Silent
Mum: He remembered the scores by heart and he practised from 1am to 5am. He put in effort and hardwork to pursue his dream.
Silent
Mum: Look at your uncle. He is a world-class violinist who performs in every part of the world. He also remembers his score and practises very hard.
Ashley: Mum, cool down. I know already. I love you, Mum. (He got off the car)
I seem to hear the "I don't care" more often than ever. I feel we should address this negative attitude on the spot. I may sound like a broken record to Ashley but I will continue to "nag" at him. I heard from some education experts and my mother that somehow, kids will hear us in their sub-conscious mind and oneday they will remember what we said to them and see the light bulb.
Warm Regards,
Broken record Loving Mum
I had an interesting conversation with Ashley on our way to school this morning...
Mum: Do you have PE today?
Ashley: Let me check. Oh, today has PE.
Mum: You're wearing school uniform. Are you allowed to take part in PE today?
Ashley: Nope, just sit one side and do nothing.
Mum: I thought you enjoyed PE?
Ashley: PE is boring now. Always do the boring stuff.
Mum: Which is more boring? Sit around or PE?
Ashley: So sickering, must remember so many things. I don't care!
Mum: What do you mean you don't care?
Ashley: It's hard to remember so many things about school!
Mum: How do you think Kieran can play the piano so beautifully without looking at the score?
Silent
Mum: How do you think Kieran got his grade 8 from grade 0 in 8 months at 18 years old?
Silent
Mum: He remembered the scores by heart and he practised from 1am to 5am. He put in effort and hardwork to pursue his dream.
Silent
Mum: Look at your uncle. He is a world-class violinist who performs in every part of the world. He also remembers his score and practises very hard.
Ashley: Mum, cool down. I know already. I love you, Mum. (He got off the car)
I seem to hear the "I don't care" more often than ever. I feel we should address this negative attitude on the spot. I may sound like a broken record to Ashley but I will continue to "nag" at him. I heard from some education experts and my mother that somehow, kids will hear us in their sub-conscious mind and oneday they will remember what we said to them and see the light bulb.
Warm Regards,
Broken record Loving Mum
Tuesday, July 13, 2010
Have you wondered what would your child speak of you to their close friends in 20 years' time?
Dear Friends,
I had lunch with a dear girl friend today and we chatted about almost everything under the sun. Naturally, we talked about relationships, all kinds of relationships. She made me realised that our mothers actually shaped our character and outlook in life. However, at certain junctures, it is the choices we made in life that determine our destiny and happiness.
I felt an even greater sense of responsibility to teach my kids well as our impact on them is a lifetime. On a lighter note, I sincerely hope that 20 years from now, they will talk about their parents in a loving way instead of blaming us. Parenting is alot of trials and errors. I hope we'll have more hits than misses so eventually resulted in net positive energy.
The best part of our lunch was that we both spoke highly of our mothers though we might have disagreements in the past. We tend to judge people by their actions, not intention. Our parents' intention for us is always good. However, their actions do injustice to them. Likewise, now that we're parents, we're trap in the same misunderstood situations.
This week has been a challenging week for us as we try to keep Ashley from computer games on weekdays. He would protest, fight back and even beg me to play computer games on weekday. My hubby and I are very insistent this time round as we finally learned from our mistake of being a parent of convenience instead of consistency. Good intention from us but he can't see it now.
Loving and caring for our children requires a good balance of soft love and hard love. I'm gulity of not practising the latter enough. My wish is that my kids will appreciate my hard love as much as they enjoy my soft love.
Warm Regards,
Enlightened Loving Mum
I had lunch with a dear girl friend today and we chatted about almost everything under the sun. Naturally, we talked about relationships, all kinds of relationships. She made me realised that our mothers actually shaped our character and outlook in life. However, at certain junctures, it is the choices we made in life that determine our destiny and happiness.
I felt an even greater sense of responsibility to teach my kids well as our impact on them is a lifetime. On a lighter note, I sincerely hope that 20 years from now, they will talk about their parents in a loving way instead of blaming us. Parenting is alot of trials and errors. I hope we'll have more hits than misses so eventually resulted in net positive energy.
The best part of our lunch was that we both spoke highly of our mothers though we might have disagreements in the past. We tend to judge people by their actions, not intention. Our parents' intention for us is always good. However, their actions do injustice to them. Likewise, now that we're parents, we're trap in the same misunderstood situations.
This week has been a challenging week for us as we try to keep Ashley from computer games on weekdays. He would protest, fight back and even beg me to play computer games on weekday. My hubby and I are very insistent this time round as we finally learned from our mistake of being a parent of convenience instead of consistency. Good intention from us but he can't see it now.
Loving and caring for our children requires a good balance of soft love and hard love. I'm gulity of not practising the latter enough. My wish is that my kids will appreciate my hard love as much as they enjoy my soft love.
Warm Regards,
Enlightened Loving Mum
Monday, July 12, 2010
Be the Chief Cheerleader to our children!
Dear Pals,
I've no shame when come to cheering on my children during their performances and important events in their life. I cheered the loudest when they were performing on stage, receiving their awards and we even made a poster for his school talent contest finals. My hubby and I are our kids' Greatest Fan!
After 2 one-hour practices, the big day has finally come. Last night, they were on stage singing with their big brother friend accompaning them on the piano at his 21st birthday party cum mini-concert. Having gone behind the scene with them during their practices and watching the three of them on stage performing last night, I was very touched by the magical way the kids synchronized together so beautifully. A little bonus was that Abby surprised us by singing the entire song instead of a small solo part. I high fived with them the minute they came back to their seats after their performance. This morning, I complimented Ashley for being such a good teacher to his little sister as she learned the entire song from him.
Ashley will be acting as a funny old turtle in the school skit during mooncake festival. He shared with me the costume he'll be wearing, the hilarious scenes and the script. As his greatest fan, I role played with him as the rabbit to help him practise his script. One week later, he proudly announced to me that he has memorized his script. I look forward to my superstar's performance during Mooncake festival.
Warm Regards,
Loving Mum
I've no shame when come to cheering on my children during their performances and important events in their life. I cheered the loudest when they were performing on stage, receiving their awards and we even made a poster for his school talent contest finals. My hubby and I are our kids' Greatest Fan!
After 2 one-hour practices, the big day has finally come. Last night, they were on stage singing with their big brother friend accompaning them on the piano at his 21st birthday party cum mini-concert. Having gone behind the scene with them during their practices and watching the three of them on stage performing last night, I was very touched by the magical way the kids synchronized together so beautifully. A little bonus was that Abby surprised us by singing the entire song instead of a small solo part. I high fived with them the minute they came back to their seats after their performance. This morning, I complimented Ashley for being such a good teacher to his little sister as she learned the entire song from him.
Ashley will be acting as a funny old turtle in the school skit during mooncake festival. He shared with me the costume he'll be wearing, the hilarious scenes and the script. As his greatest fan, I role played with him as the rabbit to help him practise his script. One week later, he proudly announced to me that he has memorized his script. I look forward to my superstar's performance during Mooncake festival.
Warm Regards,
Loving Mum
Love is Listening
Dear Friends,
I'll like to share with you the following list of Qs I read from a book:
1. Who's your child's favourite teacher?
2. Who's your child's best friend?
3. What was the incident that hurt he the most?
4. What was his proudest moment?
5. Who he admires most?
6. What kind of girl he wants to marry?
I got all answers correct except Q3. I was surpirse when he shared with me that a close relative called him useless in the fit of anger a year ago. I assured him that he is a very talented and kind boy and I'm very proud to have a child like him. As adults, we must be careful with our words when we talk to children as our words can build up or tear our children apart.
His proudest moment was when he emerged Champion in his school's talent contest. I received my greatest compliment when he said he admires me the most and he wants to marry someone like me but with very long hair.
The road to the heart is the ear. We must listen to their feelings first and later focus on the information. I listen when he chats with me in the car, bedroom, bathroom and wherever we go. Learning to listen to our children brings immerse joy as I get to know my children as individuals. Kids have so much to share with us and the best gift we can give them is our undivided attention and our listening ears.
Best Regards,
Loving Mum
I'll like to share with you the following list of Qs I read from a book:
1. Who's your child's favourite teacher?
2. Who's your child's best friend?
3. What was the incident that hurt he the most?
4. What was his proudest moment?
5. Who he admires most?
6. What kind of girl he wants to marry?
I got all answers correct except Q3. I was surpirse when he shared with me that a close relative called him useless in the fit of anger a year ago. I assured him that he is a very talented and kind boy and I'm very proud to have a child like him. As adults, we must be careful with our words when we talk to children as our words can build up or tear our children apart.
His proudest moment was when he emerged Champion in his school's talent contest. I received my greatest compliment when he said he admires me the most and he wants to marry someone like me but with very long hair.
The road to the heart is the ear. We must listen to their feelings first and later focus on the information. I listen when he chats with me in the car, bedroom, bathroom and wherever we go. Learning to listen to our children brings immerse joy as I get to know my children as individuals. Kids have so much to share with us and the best gift we can give them is our undivided attention and our listening ears.
Best Regards,
Loving Mum
Friday, July 9, 2010
Love is Patient
Dear Pals,
Ashley woke me up at 6am this morning. For the first time, he was waiting for me at the door while I washed up. I must say I'm impressed by my boy. However, last night was a different picture. He was crying and shouting because he couldn't memorize the chinese spelling. He was burning mid-night oil and was stressed up. Both my hubby and I just kept quiet and allow him get his stream out. Once he cooled down, my hubby took over the last part revision with him and he turned in peacefully after he memorized all the words.
I reflect on this incident and am glad I did not react to his anger the way I did in the past. In the past, I became very emotional and would bring up my old grandmother story why he must study hard to have a bright future. My words caused more tension than eased his anxiety. In the end, we were so mad with each other and gave each other the angry look. Luckily, my hubby was there for him.
The turning point for us was the day when his best friend, Titus and his mum came to visit us during the June holiday. The boys were having the best time in their lives playing Wii and computer games. After they left, we chatted over tea and I looked into his eyes and said, "Do you know why Mum invite your friend over to our house? I want you to have a happy childhood". I was so touched when he replied,"I want mum to have a happy adulthood too". He cares about my feeling and want me to be happy too. Each time when I raised my voice at him when he misbehaved, he would immediately look at me in the eyes and say, "Mum, Smile". Sometimes, it is hard to give a sunny smile when you're angry. When he saw my not-so-sunny smile, he would say, "You're faking. Smile please". From there on, I know I must change my attitude towards my son to help each other manage our anger.
His love and care for me makes me more determined to be more patient with him. I will always remember he woke up early on Mothers' Day to make me a card using powerpoint. He wrote, "Thank you Mum for being so kind and supportive. I love you". I gave him a bear hug that lasted 10 minutes. We are very lucky to have a loving son.
Boys are boys. They tend to be more active and sensitive. Thus, they get angry over trivial matters more often. Their little eyes are watching us all the time. To teach them patience and love, we must walk the talk. No wonder my sisters said to me that I've become a better person after I become a mother. That's the best compliment I ever received.
Cheers!
Loving Mum learning the Art of Patience
Ashley woke me up at 6am this morning. For the first time, he was waiting for me at the door while I washed up. I must say I'm impressed by my boy. However, last night was a different picture. He was crying and shouting because he couldn't memorize the chinese spelling. He was burning mid-night oil and was stressed up. Both my hubby and I just kept quiet and allow him get his stream out. Once he cooled down, my hubby took over the last part revision with him and he turned in peacefully after he memorized all the words.
I reflect on this incident and am glad I did not react to his anger the way I did in the past. In the past, I became very emotional and would bring up my old grandmother story why he must study hard to have a bright future. My words caused more tension than eased his anxiety. In the end, we were so mad with each other and gave each other the angry look. Luckily, my hubby was there for him.
The turning point for us was the day when his best friend, Titus and his mum came to visit us during the June holiday. The boys were having the best time in their lives playing Wii and computer games. After they left, we chatted over tea and I looked into his eyes and said, "Do you know why Mum invite your friend over to our house? I want you to have a happy childhood". I was so touched when he replied,"I want mum to have a happy adulthood too". He cares about my feeling and want me to be happy too. Each time when I raised my voice at him when he misbehaved, he would immediately look at me in the eyes and say, "Mum, Smile". Sometimes, it is hard to give a sunny smile when you're angry. When he saw my not-so-sunny smile, he would say, "You're faking. Smile please". From there on, I know I must change my attitude towards my son to help each other manage our anger.
His love and care for me makes me more determined to be more patient with him. I will always remember he woke up early on Mothers' Day to make me a card using powerpoint. He wrote, "Thank you Mum for being so kind and supportive. I love you". I gave him a bear hug that lasted 10 minutes. We are very lucky to have a loving son.
Boys are boys. They tend to be more active and sensitive. Thus, they get angry over trivial matters more often. Their little eyes are watching us all the time. To teach them patience and love, we must walk the talk. No wonder my sisters said to me that I've become a better person after I become a mother. That's the best compliment I ever received.
Cheers!
Loving Mum learning the Art of Patience
Thursday, July 8, 2010
Interest drives the kids' learning
Dear Folks,
Ashley woke me up this morning at 6:10am for the first time. Compared to his struggle to wake up when he first started his morning session in Jan, he has made alot of progress. In less than 5 mins, we're out of the door. He wanted to reach school earlier than his friends. Boys are competitive in nature and sometimes, a little friendly competition is good for them.
He had his first individual piano lesson yesterday. The teacher praised him for his attentiveness and ability to play. He was over the rainbows. When he got home, he immediately practised on the keyboard what he learned and finished his piano homework in a flash. I didn't even have to speak a word.
Unquestionable, interest drives his learning. He could remember 60 different cuntry flags and 100 dinosaur names when he was 3; over 100 pokemon names and their abilities when he was 4 and complicated chinese lyrics when he was 5. Every child works in the same way. As parents, we just faciliate their pursuit of their interests. I hope he will channel this self-motivation to his studies which can be challenging as teachers in school are pressed with time to allow them to nurture the interest in the students. I tried to buy him interesting reading materials like Adventure Box and Discovery Box to stir his interest. Unfortunately, he is not motivated to read by himself as he has greater interest in computer games and Wii. I'll have to read with him.
As what my hubby said, we have to give him time to develop his interest in study as he is still a kid. My hubby recalled he only started to study in P5 and before that he just played all day. At least he managed to get into Chinese High. My hubby is right. We need to give them time to grow and learn. There's a Chinese saying, "Yu shu ze bu da", meaning we may not reach our goal if we try to speed up the process. As a goal-driven and action-oriented person, I'm constantly reminding myself to let Ashley learn at his own pace and not overload him. Not easy for someone who is always on the go. Luckily, my hubby serves as a good moderator to restore the balance with our kids.
Cheers!
Loving Mum
Ashley woke me up this morning at 6:10am for the first time. Compared to his struggle to wake up when he first started his morning session in Jan, he has made alot of progress. In less than 5 mins, we're out of the door. He wanted to reach school earlier than his friends. Boys are competitive in nature and sometimes, a little friendly competition is good for them.
He had his first individual piano lesson yesterday. The teacher praised him for his attentiveness and ability to play. He was over the rainbows. When he got home, he immediately practised on the keyboard what he learned and finished his piano homework in a flash. I didn't even have to speak a word.
Unquestionable, interest drives his learning. He could remember 60 different cuntry flags and 100 dinosaur names when he was 3; over 100 pokemon names and their abilities when he was 4 and complicated chinese lyrics when he was 5. Every child works in the same way. As parents, we just faciliate their pursuit of their interests. I hope he will channel this self-motivation to his studies which can be challenging as teachers in school are pressed with time to allow them to nurture the interest in the students. I tried to buy him interesting reading materials like Adventure Box and Discovery Box to stir his interest. Unfortunately, he is not motivated to read by himself as he has greater interest in computer games and Wii. I'll have to read with him.
As what my hubby said, we have to give him time to develop his interest in study as he is still a kid. My hubby recalled he only started to study in P5 and before that he just played all day. At least he managed to get into Chinese High. My hubby is right. We need to give them time to grow and learn. There's a Chinese saying, "Yu shu ze bu da", meaning we may not reach our goal if we try to speed up the process. As a goal-driven and action-oriented person, I'm constantly reminding myself to let Ashley learn at his own pace and not overload him. Not easy for someone who is always on the go. Luckily, my hubby serves as a good moderator to restore the balance with our kids.
Cheers!
Loving Mum
Wednesday, July 7, 2010
Take time to know our kids
Dear Friends,
Do we know who's our kids' best friends and what they do during their favourite lesson in school, Recess? Do we know what matters to them most and what's their opinion of us?
Ashley, my boy came back from school yesterday and requested me to bring him to Bryan's, his classmate's home on Sat to play Maple Story computer game. As I do not know the boy and his mum, I asked to speak with the mum first. We had a good conversation on the boys and I learned from her that Ashley is her boy's best friend. That reminded me of a nice story I learned from a mum at his P1 classmate's party last year. She shared with me that Ashley is her boy's best friend and he missed Ashley alot when they relocated to Hong Kong. He wanted to write Ashley a letter and mail to Ashley's "Happy House". Ashley must have told him about the Pooh Bear Happy House sign we hang at our main door. The two mummies had a good laugh 'cos her boy insisted on mailing the letter to the Happy House without address, thinking Ashley will receive the letter.
I asked Ashley why the boys regard him as their best friends and he has no clues. I think I know why. This morning, I asked him what he and Bryan do in school together. He shared with me that he always hang out with 10 boys including Bryan during recess. They will take turns to be leaders. As the leader, Bryan will lead the Star Wars game. When it's Ashley's turn, he will play soccer with his friends. Back in class, he will signal to Bryan to have their private meeting in the toilet. When the teacher asked him why he took so long to come back, he told the teacher he was suffering from constipation. At that moment, I tried to refrain myself from telling him that this behaviour is unacceptable. I just let him talk. I plan to propose alternatives to their private meetings like going to school earlier or visit each other on weekend as attentiveness in school is very important. I'm adjusting my parenting style to communicate with him more like a friend so as to build a safe environment for him to share his secrets with me.
Ashley is a natural cheerleader to his friends and sister. I think that's why his friends find him warm and encouraging. Having said that, he is still your regular kid. He gets upset when I praised Abby, my daughter and when she got a bigger trophey than him. He throws tantrum when he refuses to do his homework. He agrues with his friends when they disagree on how to write the script for their project, etc. I'm not perfect and I don't expect my kids to be perfect. I simply focus on their strengths and encourage them to give their best at all times.
Warm Regards,
Loving Mum
Do we know who's our kids' best friends and what they do during their favourite lesson in school, Recess? Do we know what matters to them most and what's their opinion of us?
Ashley, my boy came back from school yesterday and requested me to bring him to Bryan's, his classmate's home on Sat to play Maple Story computer game. As I do not know the boy and his mum, I asked to speak with the mum first. We had a good conversation on the boys and I learned from her that Ashley is her boy's best friend. That reminded me of a nice story I learned from a mum at his P1 classmate's party last year. She shared with me that Ashley is her boy's best friend and he missed Ashley alot when they relocated to Hong Kong. He wanted to write Ashley a letter and mail to Ashley's "Happy House". Ashley must have told him about the Pooh Bear Happy House sign we hang at our main door. The two mummies had a good laugh 'cos her boy insisted on mailing the letter to the Happy House without address, thinking Ashley will receive the letter.
I asked Ashley why the boys regard him as their best friends and he has no clues. I think I know why. This morning, I asked him what he and Bryan do in school together. He shared with me that he always hang out with 10 boys including Bryan during recess. They will take turns to be leaders. As the leader, Bryan will lead the Star Wars game. When it's Ashley's turn, he will play soccer with his friends. Back in class, he will signal to Bryan to have their private meeting in the toilet. When the teacher asked him why he took so long to come back, he told the teacher he was suffering from constipation. At that moment, I tried to refrain myself from telling him that this behaviour is unacceptable. I just let him talk. I plan to propose alternatives to their private meetings like going to school earlier or visit each other on weekend as attentiveness in school is very important. I'm adjusting my parenting style to communicate with him more like a friend so as to build a safe environment for him to share his secrets with me.
Ashley is a natural cheerleader to his friends and sister. I think that's why his friends find him warm and encouraging. Having said that, he is still your regular kid. He gets upset when I praised Abby, my daughter and when she got a bigger trophey than him. He throws tantrum when he refuses to do his homework. He agrues with his friends when they disagree on how to write the script for their project, etc. I'm not perfect and I don't expect my kids to be perfect. I simply focus on their strengths and encourage them to give their best at all times.
Warm Regards,
Loving Mum
Tuesday, July 6, 2010
Introduce our kids to cool people with passion
Dear Friends,
It's a little sad watching our kids grow up so quickly. I guess all I can do is to stay devoted to them and be generous with my time with my kids. Instead of wasting time telling them what to do and keep nagging, I try to introduce them to cool people with passion to actively develop their minds, hearts and souls.
As my boy is a music lover, I'll surround him with talented and passionate musicians like the 20 year-old young man who happens to be my friend's son. His uncle is one of the Tang Quartet violinists. I'll share with him that even musicians need the foundation of a good education as both have benefited from the university education and his uncle was from RI (sometimes, I may try too hard. Hehehe).
His music teacher, Jiu Jian is his idol. My boy could memorize new Chinese songs written by Jiu Jian during the 1.5 hour class and he would sing for us in the car. Last week, he sang a new song written by Jiu Jian for his new Chinese Musical Re-kindle Love Sequel in Mar'11. He got my boy interested in Chinese Musical and song writing. My son was so excited that he will be playing the magical dog who turned into a human in the new Musical. He is so serious that he sings the new song everywhere he goes, even waiting for the MRT. I can feel his happiness...
Yesterday I received an email from a friend informing us that he will be shaving his head on 25 Jul 2010 at Vivocity to raise awareness about childhood cancer. I asked my boy if he wants to also shave his head to support the patients. He decided to keep his hair and donate instead. He knows my friend and he wanted to be there to support this kind uncle.
Please show your support for the foundation by clicking on the following link to make a donation:
http://www.hairforhope.org.sg/hfh/shavee/show/848
Through his personal interaction with these cool people, am sure he will rub off some of their brilliance and shine.
Warm Regards,
Loving Mum
Monday, July 5, 2010
My Courageous Prince and his idol, SpongeBob SquarePants
Dear Parents,
My boy wanted me to blog about him after he saw my blog about my girl. He's the one who came up with the title which I thought describes him pretty well.
Besides the courage to go on stage to sing, dance, act and show off his wushu moves, he has the courage to try new things even though he has to endure some degree of pain. When he first tried on the ortho-k hard lens, he did not cry or rub his eyes even though it was painful. Another incident that struck me was how he overcame his spinning headache to put up his best performance during the recent public performance at the Art House organized by his singing teacher, Jiu Jian:
http://2voices10fingers.blogspot.com/2010/06/2-voices-10-fingers-ticket-and-show.html
I just read him a bedtime story, Praise by George Tan from the Chicken Soup for the Singapore Soul. He just said, "I like this story" and he fell asleep. I remembered we cried and blew our noses after reading Willy's Clinic by Dr. Ang Peng Tiam when he was 7 years old. We were touched by Dr. Ang's kindness and Willy's perserverance. Till today, he still remembers Willy's story.
My son is a joker. His idol is SpongeBob SquarePants. We enjoy a good laugh watching SpongeBob cartoon together. He told me if SpongeBob were a human being, the world would be a funnier place. He cited the part where SpongeBob was late for work for one minute. The next day, he decided to sleep overnight in the restaurant to make sure he would not be late for work. He finds it very funny and silly. I added that SpongeBob is a very responsible person and he agreed. We also feel that SpongeBob is a very kind and optimistic guy. He loves his pals in Bikini Bottom, even Squidword, the mean guy who always belittle him. We also find SpongeBob one of a kind. He has the courage to be himself and not follow the crowd. Thanks to my courageous and joker son, I get to know SpongeBob and re-live my childhood. More importantly, besides sharing laughters together, we get to rub off some of SpongeBob's wisdom on our kids and ourselves. Hahaha.....
Yours Truly,
Joker's Loving Mum
My boy wanted me to blog about him after he saw my blog about my girl. He's the one who came up with the title which I thought describes him pretty well.
Besides the courage to go on stage to sing, dance, act and show off his wushu moves, he has the courage to try new things even though he has to endure some degree of pain. When he first tried on the ortho-k hard lens, he did not cry or rub his eyes even though it was painful. Another incident that struck me was how he overcame his spinning headache to put up his best performance during the recent public performance at the Art House organized by his singing teacher, Jiu Jian:
http://2voices10fingers.blogspot.com/2010/06/2-voices-10-fingers-ticket-and-show.html
I just read him a bedtime story, Praise by George Tan from the Chicken Soup for the Singapore Soul. He just said, "I like this story" and he fell asleep. I remembered we cried and blew our noses after reading Willy's Clinic by Dr. Ang Peng Tiam when he was 7 years old. We were touched by Dr. Ang's kindness and Willy's perserverance. Till today, he still remembers Willy's story.
My son is a joker. His idol is SpongeBob SquarePants. We enjoy a good laugh watching SpongeBob cartoon together. He told me if SpongeBob were a human being, the world would be a funnier place. He cited the part where SpongeBob was late for work for one minute. The next day, he decided to sleep overnight in the restaurant to make sure he would not be late for work. He finds it very funny and silly. I added that SpongeBob is a very responsible person and he agreed. We also feel that SpongeBob is a very kind and optimistic guy. He loves his pals in Bikini Bottom, even Squidword, the mean guy who always belittle him. We also find SpongeBob one of a kind. He has the courage to be himself and not follow the crowd. Thanks to my courageous and joker son, I get to know SpongeBob and re-live my childhood. More importantly, besides sharing laughters together, we get to rub off some of SpongeBob's wisdom on our kids and ourselves. Hahaha.....
Yours Truly,
Joker's Loving Mum
My sweet little Princess
Dear Friends,
I drove my 4.5 year-old girl to her 1st coloring contest yesterday. 3 hours later, she earned herself her 1st trophey. Not too bad for a little girl to emerge 5th out of 15 children. In fact, my hubby and I are still scratching our heads where her artistic genes come from as both of us can't draw. She could spend 1~2 hours by herself doodling and coloring and she always has a nice story for each drawing. Once, I brought them to take the roller coaster ride in Escape Theme Park. Few days later, she would show me her roller coaster drawing with her and her brother screaming away in the monster ride. So far, I've filed more than 100 drawings and counting.
My mum-in-law and I feel that she takes after her daddy's gentle and giving personality. Sometimes, when her brother got scolding from us, she will say to me, "I want Mummy loves my brother more". Then, she would shake off my hands and want me to hold her brother's hand. When I tried to hold both of their hands, she stepped back and refused to hold my hand. I was very touched and troubled by her action. I tried to explain to her that I love both of them but she only held my hand when her brother asked her to do so.
I'll always remember the night we rushed her to KK A&E hospital for a suspected fractured arm as she kept crying and holding on to her arm when she was two years old. We burst into laughter after we saw her reaching out to get the 2 sweets from the Doctor. She immediately popped one sweet in her mouth and kept the other one for her brother. Her love for her brother is simply shown in that precious sweet. We are very lucky to have such a thoughtful and kind daughter.
Warm Regards,
Loving Mum
I drove my 4.5 year-old girl to her 1st coloring contest yesterday. 3 hours later, she earned herself her 1st trophey. Not too bad for a little girl to emerge 5th out of 15 children. In fact, my hubby and I are still scratching our heads where her artistic genes come from as both of us can't draw. She could spend 1~2 hours by herself doodling and coloring and she always has a nice story for each drawing. Once, I brought them to take the roller coaster ride in Escape Theme Park. Few days later, she would show me her roller coaster drawing with her and her brother screaming away in the monster ride. So far, I've filed more than 100 drawings and counting.
My mum-in-law and I feel that she takes after her daddy's gentle and giving personality. Sometimes, when her brother got scolding from us, she will say to me, "I want Mummy loves my brother more". Then, she would shake off my hands and want me to hold her brother's hand. When I tried to hold both of their hands, she stepped back and refused to hold my hand. I was very touched and troubled by her action. I tried to explain to her that I love both of them but she only held my hand when her brother asked her to do so.
I'll always remember the night we rushed her to KK A&E hospital for a suspected fractured arm as she kept crying and holding on to her arm when she was two years old. We burst into laughter after we saw her reaching out to get the 2 sweets from the Doctor. She immediately popped one sweet in her mouth and kept the other one for her brother. Her love for her brother is simply shown in that precious sweet. We are very lucky to have such a thoughtful and kind daughter.
Warm Regards,
Loving Mum
Saturday, July 3, 2010
Wonderful story of a talented musician who inspires my boy to learn piano
Dear Friends,
When I asked my children what was the best part of today, both mentioned they had so much fun visiting their twenty year-old musician friend. Today was their first practice for a special performance on July 11 as he just came back from Australia where he is pursuing his Bachelor of Art degree. Their special friend had invited them to sing at his 21st birthday party while he accompanies them on the piano on July 11.
He started playing piano at 18. Self-taught and thus, not bounded by the conventions of piano playing, he is able to play by ear, and constantly improvises to different music genres, from classical to contemporary pop. You could feel his passion and energy when he plays. He has natural talents in music and with kids as kids just clicked with him instantly. My kids are blessed to have an older friend they could relate and look up to. My boy is inspired by him to learn piano. I dream of a joint concert by them in years to come....
Cheers!
Loving Mum
When I asked my children what was the best part of today, both mentioned they had so much fun visiting their twenty year-old musician friend. Today was their first practice for a special performance on July 11 as he just came back from Australia where he is pursuing his Bachelor of Art degree. Their special friend had invited them to sing at his 21st birthday party while he accompanies them on the piano on July 11.
He started playing piano at 18. Self-taught and thus, not bounded by the conventions of piano playing, he is able to play by ear, and constantly improvises to different music genres, from classical to contemporary pop. You could feel his passion and energy when he plays. He has natural talents in music and with kids as kids just clicked with him instantly. My kids are blessed to have an older friend they could relate and look up to. My boy is inspired by him to learn piano. I dream of a joint concert by them in years to come....
Cheers!
Loving Mum
Friday, July 2, 2010
My kids, my inspiration!
Dear Friends,
I just decided to start blogging this morning at a ripe age of 38 after I sent my 8.5 years old boy to school. Every morning, I'll share stories with him during our 20 mins drive. Somedays, when I was caught up with my work, I forgot about it and he will ask me for the stories. Then, I realise how much he prefers my story telling to my nagging. Thus, I decided to pay more attention to the news and life stories of people around me, so that I can share these wonderful stories with my boy every morning without fail. I wish he will learn something valuable from these stories.
This morning, we talked about last night's Channel U 8pm show featuring street children living in despair in India and how the Catholic Boys Shelter gives them hope. To the young minds, seeing is believing. I can see that he is quite affected by what he saw. I just reiterate the ending words to him,"We can't choose our parents or the place we are born. However, we can choose our future with our hardwork." I hope he starts to realise how lucky he is.
My boy and I share a special bond as we mirror each other in many ways. He inspired me to pursue my passion without any reservations. I've been working for the last 15 years and this year I started my own Executive Search firm and I've never felt so fulfilled before. I truly enjoy the balance of family and career.
I just decided to start blogging this morning at a ripe age of 38 after I sent my 8.5 years old boy to school. Every morning, I'll share stories with him during our 20 mins drive. Somedays, when I was caught up with my work, I forgot about it and he will ask me for the stories. Then, I realise how much he prefers my story telling to my nagging. Thus, I decided to pay more attention to the news and life stories of people around me, so that I can share these wonderful stories with my boy every morning without fail. I wish he will learn something valuable from these stories.
This morning, we talked about last night's Channel U 8pm show featuring street children living in despair in India and how the Catholic Boys Shelter gives them hope. To the young minds, seeing is believing. I can see that he is quite affected by what he saw. I just reiterate the ending words to him,"We can't choose our parents or the place we are born. However, we can choose our future with our hardwork." I hope he starts to realise how lucky he is.
My boy and I share a special bond as we mirror each other in many ways. He inspired me to pursue my passion without any reservations. I've been working for the last 15 years and this year I started my own Executive Search firm and I've never felt so fulfilled before. I truly enjoy the balance of family and career.
I drew the courage from my son. At a young age, he has decided to become a World-class singer when he grows up. He started his group singing lesson about 2 years ago and started his individual singing lesson in Jan'10. He loves singing so much that he does not mind he is the only boy left in the group of 15 girls. When he performs on stage, he enjoys his performance to the fullest and the audience could feel his passion.
He recently came in first at his school Talent Contest voted by students! Recently, he requested to learn piano so that he could sing and play the piano at the same time. I agreed on the condition that he has to give up his individual singing and revert to group singing class so that the money saved can go to fund his piano lesson. He finally agreed after much persuasion as he enjoys his individual singing lesson very much. Hope he understands the value of money and Mummy is not a bottomless pit.
I hope my blog will help my kids and me remember the ups and downs of their growing up years. I've learned so much from my kids and my wish is to give them a happy and memorable childhood they will fondly remember when they grow up. I also wish to pass on the two precious gifts from our parents to our kids: 1) A set of good values system and 2) A good education.
Last but not least, I hope this blog will also serve as a nice platform for us, parents to share experience in our parenting journey.
Have a Blessed and Wonderful weekend!
Warmest Regards,
Loving Mum
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